Desert Hills resident stresses positive outlook in self-help book


A fair number of laid back people describe themselves as having a go with the flow approach to life.
Desert Hills resident Nicole Bandes has spent the last 18 months working as a life coach and explains within the go with the flow crowd there are two distinct ways of getting through life.
“If you have ever been kayaking or rafting, you know that the idea is to ride the river in the direction of the flow of water,” she said. “It’s the easiest path. Rowing against the stream is difficult and gets you no where fast. However, there’s a difference between rafting and tubing. Tubing is a sport where you grab an old tire inner tube or something to float on and gently float down a river enjoying the day and relaxing. With rafting and kayaking, you actually navigate the best path while the water takes you in the forward direction. You are choosing your path carefully and making educated decisions about where you want to go while flowing at the same time.”
Bandes suggests people are best served in life by using a paddle.
“In life, it isn’t ideal to just sit back and allow whatever is going to happen to happen without our input or decisions,” she said. “This would be the extreme side of going with the flow. Unfortunately, while it does tend to minimize a negative attitude, it doesn’t move us forward very fast. Therefore, we must maximize the process by going in the right direction while propelling ourselves forward at the same time and on the most optimal path available.”
For those looking to avoid having their vessel in life get swamped by waves of negativity Bandes said she believes she has something to positively change people’s mindsets.
At 5:30 p.m., May 18 Bandes will be at Eli’s American Grille in Scottsdale for a book release party.
“Positivity on Purpose, Intentionally Create More Abundance, Wealth and Happiness,” is the realization of a long-time dream for the Northern Arizona University graduate, who has a degree in psychology.
“Since the sixth grade I knew I was going to write a book,” she said. “When the idea came to me for the book I was able to put it all together in about six months.”
The book offers more than 40 different techniques meant to give the reader exercises to shift their thinking tobe more positive.
“Every person is an individual, so some of the 40 techniques are going to work better for some than for others,” she said. “People can flip around if they want and they might find a chapter that especially resonates for them. There’s definitely a multitude of ideas that anybody can use to make a positive impact on their life.”
Bandes said she’s aware that not everyone has the finances to get help from a life
coach, but thinks the book is a nice substitute.
“I think this book will definitely give people a kick-start in the right direction,” she said.
When it comes to her main work as a life coach, Bandes said it is her job to help people clear their mind.
“When I meet with clients we talk about the times they feel like they’re burdened with a lot of negative thoughts,” she said. “I think of myself as a trash collector. I get rid of those thoughts for the people I work with and refocus their mindset. That way they can
get more positive results with their thinking.”
Bandes said that some people come to her with the belief they need help with their personal lives and that some come thinking they need help in their professional life, but that almost without exception the two are extensively related.
“So many people are frustrated with all the negative news about the economy, but I really try and help them see what they have to be grateful for,” she said. “I usually meet with clients once a week. I’m like a chiropractor for the brain. Just like you can do something to irritate your back you can have a bad day where you start focusing on negative thoughts. They come back to me and I make an adjustment to get them back in alignment.”
The Desert Hills resident said that the needs of her clients vary.
“I had a woman who had unsuccessfully been trying to quit smoking come in and in one session figured it out and was able to quit,” she said. “And then I think on the other side I worked with one client for six months.”
Along with the live book signing on May 18 Bandes will be interacting with fans on Facebook at!/positivityonpurpose throughout the day. The book, which will be available on, costs $14.95.
For information on life coaching and the book go to
or call 623-328-8918.